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Tag Archives: human kindness

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A couple nights ago, I was prompted (somehow) to read bullying laws and (about) how to recognize whether a child is a bully or being bullied.  Somewhat dull reading, but I’m always flabbergasted that some basic causes of “bullyism” are not addressed.  Why aren’t children taught the Golden Rule?  Why do children think they are immune from bad things happening to them in the future?   

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If you’ve read some of my other blogs, you’ll know I’m no supporter of the current school system or of people working long hours and not enjoying life.  That having been said, if families were together more and able to socialize as families more, children would learn how to act in public and with age groups other than those they go all through school with (confined to classes of their own age groups, generally).  They would learn by example ~~ seeing adults and other well-behaved children treat all age groups with respect ~~ and they would get verbal guidance, as needed [“Johnny, don’t say that; it’s not nice…”].   

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The bullying Karen Klein endured was awful, but, after the punishment for the middle schoolers was announced, I, actually, felt sorry for the students.  They are four (?) of millions and millions of children and adults who bully, who make life difficult for others by harassing and badgering.  Half of America should be suspended ~~ from something ~~ and do community service ~~ of doing nice things for other people ~~ because rudeness is everywhere!  I have witnessed such extreme rudeness by adults, it’s not a wonder children lack moral guidance.

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I don’t know why children and young adults ~~ actually, people who bully of any age ~~ think their lives are always going to be so perfect, their plans for their futures so cast in cement.  They seem to think they will always be handsome/beautiful, skinny and young, they will get and always have well-paying jobs, won’t ever be forced to live in mobile homes, won’t ever be victims of accidents or crimes that might disfigure them… and, well, all those things we all wish were true.  All people should live by the Golden Rule.  It would better the world in so many ways. 

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I keep wondering if I deserve the terrible life I’ve had.  I think I’ve been a good person, all things considered.  I’m not saying I am flawless.  I have been remembering my childhood ~~ now that I have time to ~~ all the things I had to “forget” in order to survive (like, witnessing my father do something horrific and my having to pretend it didn’t happen, so he would not ~~ I dare say ~~ kill me).  I promised myself, someday, I would take the time to remember.  

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I live in a breaking-down mobile home with no (working) air conditioning.  I actually consider that a blessing, since I can’t afford to run it.  I have had no (working) stove for years — if food can’t be cooked in a toaster oven, I don’t buy it.  My car stalls.  I think it’s the spark plugs.  (The “check engine” light has been on for most of 7 years.  Back when it first came on, I had the problem checked ~~ “spark plug #1” showed up on the electronic diagnosis gadget.  I guess it’s finally giving out.)  The weeds in the yard are getting as tall as me.  I have never had a lawn mower (in the 8 years I’ve lived in a house with a yard).  I’ve been using a weed trimmer to “mow”.  That finally broke.  The part I need is cheap, but I can’t force myself to press the button to find out how much it’s going to cost to ship.  (Have you ever needed a $2 part and had to pay $7.95 to get it shipped?  Ugh!)  A few days ago, I replaced the vacuum cleaner – again.  This one may have set a record for lasting… Did it really last over a year?  I worry, every time I do laundry, that the spin cycle will shake this mobile home right off its block foundation.  I can see a corner block crumbling.  I can’t see most of the blocks.  What do I do if it does collapse?  I have no insurance.  The roof leaks ~~ it’s small and the least of my problems right now.  Possums have torn up the air ducts under the house, so, even if I get the air conditioner to work, I will need to get duct work done to use it.  I pray, every day, that God protects this house from all disasters ~~ including fire ~~ because some ceiling lights and wall electrical outlets have stopped working.  Mobile homes are notorious for fires due to faulty wiring.  My car’s air conditioner and windshield wipers haven’t worked in years.  I actually have to check weather reports before going to get groceries.  And, with the engine situation now, I’m afraid to get groceries — I’m afraid my car won’t start & I’ll be stuck with no (affordable) help and melting groceries.  There are more problems, of course, but why go on?    

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I continue to ask myself why people don’t just help each other and stop this economic nonsense. 

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I try to fix everything myself ~~ to save money and because I don’t trust repair people.  (One mechanic told me it would cost $210-220 ~~ plus parts! ~~ for replace that “spark plug #1” because the whole engine had to be lifted out of the car to get to it.  Is that right?  The research I’ve done, this past week, said replacing spark plugs isn’t difficult, but removing a part (I forget the name) would make them easier to get to.  None of the research (though limited) mentioned having to remove the engine.)  Right now, I can’t afford the parts, even if I researched “how-to” and made all these repairs myself.  And, I am very sick (with lupus) ~~ finding the strength of mind and body is so difficult.  

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So, why do I deserve this?  I guess I don’t think I do…. but, here I am.  I don’t think anyone should live like this.  More later.  I need to turn off my computer before it melts.     

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This has been very hard sharing my personal hell with you…. but I’m breaking down, too.

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